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If you could be king for a day ...


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Is there anything you'd like to change about any production? Like, "I'd be able to enjoy the production IF" ...

For me, here's a list:

1. I'd get rid of the Grigorivich Snowflake wigs. They look like awful Norman Bates' "mother" copycats, and are so loosely pasted onto the dancers' heads that you can see the crack between the head and the 'wig.

2. I'd change the scene when Marie first meets the Prince in Balanchine's Nutcracker. For me she lies on the bed way too long. I'd love to see the two little tykes run around onstage or something, basking in the night.

3. I'd restore Balanchine's original concept of "Square Dance", with the caller and everything.

4. I'd restore Balanchine's original Apollo.

5. I'd restore most of Act IV of Kevin McKenzie's Swan Lake, as I find it to be the most touching part of the ballet.

6. I'd get rid of the swan formation in the Mariinsky's Swan Lake. The swans lined up in vertical rows doesnt seem as effective as the swans lined up in a triangle.

7. In productions of Le Corsaire I'd make the slave pdd a pdd! I personally find Conrad's presence in the pas de trois to be a nuisance.

8. I'd get rid of Jesters everywhere.

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8. I'd get rid of Jesters everywhere.

Please don't let Daniel Ulbricht hear you!

There's a wonderful piece about him in the New Ballet Review.

I'd happily second nixing the jesters. The first time I saw one I was still a teen and was at a screening of the Kirov Swan Lake movie. I was not happy, but most of the audience at the film evidently agreed with me . Much booing

Also I would get rid of the chickens in Fille Mal Gardee and the goats in Sylvia. These do nothing but annoy me.

Richard

Edited by richard53dog
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For Helgi Tomasson's production of Sleeping Beauty, I'd prefer if he'd given the "Maids of Honour/Pages" dance to, well, the pages and maids of honor, instead of the four princes, which is what he did. I'd also prefer to see it without those powdered wigs.

I always used to think that SF Ballet's old Nutcracker (Christensen version) would have been perfect with different costumes and sets than the clunky, Sanrio-pastel ones it had. Of course, with the new Nutcracker at SFB, this item is moot.

Lambarena would look better, in my opinion, without the fake ponytails on the male principals. I already love the women's costumes to death.

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I would put the mime back into the Kirov's Swan Lake and remove the jester.

I'd alter the Bluebird pas de deux in the reconstructed Sleeping Beauty so that it follows the Stepanov notation.

I'd remove that ridiculous bed from Balanchine's Nutcracker.

And (not to directly contradict Canbelto!) I'd put Conrad back into the Le Corsaire pas de trois. The choreography just doesn't make sense without a third person IMO.

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I'd remove that ridiculous bed from Balanchine's Nutcracker.

LOL about the bed. I've always hated it too. I especially hate how you can hear the pitter patter of the poor "bed boy" running around onstage under the tiny bed.

Another thing I'd change about Balanchine's Nutcracker: I'd restore the original pdd sequence: pdd, male variation, sugar plum fairy variation, etc. I just don't like how Balanchine messed around with the most basic of pdd structuring.

Another thing: I'd have 32 Shades in Makarova's La Bayadere. Nureyev's Bayadere has 32 shades, and the effect is much more impressive, IMO.

I'd restore Carabosse's and Lilac Fairy's mime in the Sergeyev Sleeping Beauty, instead of having Carabosse simply running around like a nutjob onstage during the prologue. I'd also ditch the wigs the fairies have to wear.

In fact, I'd say in 90% of the cases I'd ditch wigs period. Ballerinas have the most beautiful hair in the world -- why hide it under a curly powdered mop?

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Wonderful! A chance to be an old curmudgeon. Here goes:

Those cutout swans gliding on the lake at the start and conclusion of Act II, Swan Lake. Do it brilliantly or don't do it at all.

Dancers who turn the Nurse in R&J into too much of a caricature and too easy a joke.

The convention that divertissements and pas de deux in court scenes (eg. Sleeping Beauty) must be observed by an audience of costumed supernumaries who sit around the back of the stage, legs crossed, smiling vapidly, occasionally making small, mechanical adjustments in arms or head direction, obviously wondering when this ghastly business will be over with.

Dancers (often Russian) who drag out the curtain calls with elaborate reverences, kissing of roses, faux-humble glances at partner and/or audience. My rule: if the curtain call is longer, grander and more elaborate than the performance ... cut it out.

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Dancers (often Russian) who drag out the curtain calls with elaborate reverences, kissing of roses, faux-humble glances at partner and/or audience.  My rule:  if the curtain call is longer, grander and more elaborate than the performance ... cut it out.

You would have loved Nora Kaye as the Russian ballerina in Tudor's 'Gala Performance'. She hit all the bases you mentioned. At the time, she was doubly hilarious because it was felt she was imitating Toumanova.

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I love the chickens, too!!  And I think they set the whole ballet up in the right mood:  FUN!

I love the chickens too! But I'd favor saving them even if I hated them. Look how 20th century A. D.'s have "improved" the masterpieces of Petipa. We don't want to encourage 21st century A. D.'s (many of whom are all too willing to be "improvers" --as recent "Swan Lake" desecrations prove) to do the same to 20th century masterpieces, especially not to the greatest full-length ballet of that century! If need be, I'd rather close my eyes rather than have an A.D. close them for me.

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I love the chickens too!  But I'd favor saving them even if I hated them.  Look how 20th century A. D.'s have "improved" the masterpieces of Petipa.  We don't want to encourage 21st century A. D.'s (many of whom are all too willing to be "improvers" --as recent "Swan Lake" desecrations prove) to do the same to 20th century masterpieces, especially not to the greatest full-length ballet of that century!  If need be, I'd rather close my eyes rather than have an A.D. close them for me.

This is getting OT, but I dont think Fille mal gardee is the greatest full-length ballet of the 20th century, not by a long-shot. There's Midsummer's Night Dream, Romeo and Juliet, Cinderella, just to name three ....

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