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Ed Waffle

More definitions of "musical"

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Here are a few definitions which can be modified for singers, dancers, instrumentalists or conductors. In each instance the most important part is the pronoun. Additions to the lexicon are most welcome.

I use rubato; you have an unclear beat; he can’t count to four.

I am deeply sensitive; you are sentimental; he is pathetic.

I have a trill; you have vibrato; she has a wobble.

My (singing, dancing, playing, conducting) is exciting and dramatic; yours is tense and histrionic; his is irrational and maniacal.

I am a virtuoso coloratura; you don’t have a chest voice; she is a canary.

I make it look easy; you are insouciant; she is careless.

I use a relaxed tempo which lets the music breathe; you have trouble keeping some passages together; he can’t read music.

I am lyrical; you are indulgent; she is sloppy.

I am taking time off to spend with my family; You are having a vocal crisis; Her career is over.

[ March 10, 2002, 06:53 PM: Message edited by: Ed Waffle ]

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